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A Kick In The Testimonials - JOHN MOLLOY
The Celtic AGM – 2006 – A Happy Affair
As Good As It Gets
When Saturday Comes
A Kick In The Testimonials
opinion
TEXT JOHN MOLLOY
He stood there with that smug, joker-faced grin,
that over the years I've come to despise, unzipped
his tracksuit top, nodded knowingly to his
teammates and then to the cries of "Shea-rer -
Shea-rer," gingerly stepped onto the pitch to take
his penalty.
In a scene reminiscent of the Diana Ross staged
penalty at World Cup in the USA, Marshall helpfully
dived to his right before Shearer had even kicked
the ball. This time the goals did not spectacularly
fall apart as Shearer wheeled away in celebration,
but it did leave the Celtic goalie looking like
Sylvester Stallone hamming it up in Escape to
Victory. In a game so stage-managed that it would
make a Harlem Globetrotter blush, Celtic -
Scottish League Champions - contrived to give the
no.9 a dream send-off. Can you imagine English
Champions Chelsea being involved in such a farce?
Or Martin O'Neill? What a bleeding liberty!
I could maybe stomach Celtic being a stooge for
someone like Roy Keane or Shay Given, but Alan
Shearer - pass me the sick bag? If you're going to
"lie down," at least do it for someone who has
claimed to come over all dewy-eyed at the mere
sight of the hoops. As the club that 8 out of 10
players prefer for their testimonials, the least
we've come to expect is some faked sentiment.
Shearer - the embodiment of English arrogance
simply couldn't be arsed. With this in mind what
possible reason could there have been for throwing
the game? Any links Shearer has with Celtic are
mostly negative. Fair enough, he was in the South
Stand the night of Lubo's inaugural thrashing of
the huns, but left the game failing to declare who
he was supporting - there's no such thing as an
unofficial UEFA observer. For a man who probably
packs a St George's Cross towel to put over his
veranda on holiday and passionately sings God
Save the Queen, I'm thinking possibly not the team
that is inextricably linked with the Republic of
Ireland. Since then he's put the boot into Celtic, on
and off the field. I remember him at Celtic Park in
a pre-season friendly doing a more than passable
imitation of an out of control fairground waltzer as
he careered into one Celtic player after another
and in the Sky studio where along with Souness he
smirked his way through another disastrous Celtic
away night in the Champions League. If you take
into account his now legendary clashes with
Bellamy, Keane and Lennon, one wonders why we
ever granted him a testimonial in the first place.
Lest we forget, Everton's Graeme Sharp had his
testimonial cancelled after a Celtic fan felt duty
bound to remind a club official that he was in fact a
Rangers fan unmasked by a fact file in an old
Shoot magazine.
If I'm being entirely honest it wasn't so much
that we gifted the game to the "Geordie Gobshite"
but rather that we gave a top Premiership side the
"bragging rights." Defo penalty, "The ref got it spot
on" and !We've sent the jockos home tae think
again" was just some of the comments posted by
the "Loony-Toon Army" on the official Newcastle
website. You would have got more sense out of
Chris Waddle's mullet. Graciously, some of the
more lucid members of their support thanked us
for our cooperation but I found it all rather
condescending. Following on from the 3-1 defeat
by Coventry in the Richard Shaw Testimonial you
can guarantee that this result will be used by the
likes of Little Englanders Rodney Marsh and Mile
Parry as veritable proof that we couldn't "cut it" in
the Premiership. Talking head muppets they may
be, but why hand them a sally-rod to beat us with.
It may have been a testimonial but frankly I feel
very let down by whoever sanctioned this farce
and I was only watching on TV. What other worldrenowned
club would allow their players to be
embarrassed by the 39-year-old Les Ferdinand. I
don't recall the Bayern Munich midfield parting
like the red sea to give Granty a free shot at goal or
Man United indulging Tom Boyd with a penalty to
add to his two career goals for Celtic. On the
contrary I vividly remember Beckham bombing
from box-to-box as Alex Ferguson secured his first
victory over Celtic as manager of the Red Devils.
For too many years, English players, who in the
main couldn't give a toss about us, have treated
Celtic supporters like a travelling cash register. For
fans intent on a right good drinking session and the
chance to see the bhoys in action against some of
the heavyweights of English football, I doubt they
cared whether or not Sammy Nelson could name
the Lisbon team or if Paul Davies even knew there
was one. Now, things have gone too far. If the club's
policy is to throw games on the say so of filthy rich,
narcissistic footballers, then they should at least
have the decency to let us know. While they're at it
they might like to tell John Hartson his quizzical,
darting looks towards the bench was quickly
followed by open-handed protestations and finally
languid acceptance. And sure wasn't it all worth it
as Alan just about managed to thank us before Ant
and Dec switched off his mike. If it wasn't for Niall
Quinn's philanthropy inspiring fellow players to
donate their testimonial proceeds to charity, we
would be left with the lasting image of the no.9
sitting in his Tudor mansion grubbily counting out
Scottish fivers. Now that really would be a kick in
the testimonials.
BACK TO TOP
The Celtic AGM – 2006 – A Happy Affair
(but why ask such stupid questions??)
Text/Jaygee
Yes, Yes I know every year I say I am not going back to the Celtic AGM and every year I am a glutton for punishment and I trip along again and again.
This year I felt a bit different on the journey through to Glasgow on 26th October 2006 - and come to think of it on the days that lead up to the AGM too.
Several obvious factors lead to this contentment. Number one on my list was still being on a high nine days after Celtic beat Benfica 3-0 in the Champions League. Others included a whopping lead in the SPL and the Championship trophy tucked away in Celtic Park with the CIS League Cup from the previous season. The fact also that Rangers were playing so badly and Hearts were imploding did lift me each morning.
I suppose I was seeing that light at the end of a Celtic tunnel. This time the light was not an express train heading for us.
I am not a betting man but had the Ladbrokes betting stall in the concourse under the Jock Stein stand been open, I would have wagered that Dermot Desmond would have handed a note in from his guardians excusing him from attending.
Come 11am the head table appeared to take their seats. A glance around me showed about 200 shareholders were seated in the stand. I would guess that was about half the attendance in recent years. Two things struck me. First, a low attendance possibly meant a lot more were happy with the running of the club. Secondly, I noted that following the artic conditions last year, a lot of hats, scarves and gloves were in evidence. I even saw one lady with a flask of hot coffee. A wise move as it was bitterly cold with the wind and rain were making you remember winter was coming.
I would have won my Dermot Desmond bet. He was not there. The top table was complete apart from Desmond. From left to right as shareholders viewed the table it was John Keane, Brian McBride, Gordon Strachan, Peter Lawwell, Brian Quinn, Robert Howat, Eric Riley, Tom Allison, Brian Wilson and Kevin Sweeney.
At the table behind sat representatives from the company (Celtic) Auditors, Stock Brokers and Solicitors.
As Chairman Brian Quinn welcomed everyone and introduced the top table the light rain started again. Gordon Strachan’s introduction met with the only applause given to the top table. Brian Quinn actually looked a bit embarrassed as he explained that Dermot Desmond "telephoned yesterday ….. problems coming" (later Quinn explained Desmond had to travel to Chicago). I have said it before. The AGM is set a year in advance. If all the others can sort out their schedule surely Desmond can do us the courtesy of attending.
The now regular video presentation opened the AGM proceedings. I enjoyed the video this year. Tony Hamilton put set questions on camera to:
Brian Quinn
Quinn confirmed revenue was up even though the 2005/6 early exit from Europe was a big factor on income. Merchandise involving Nike had an increased turnover.
Next Brian Quinn covered the passing of Jimmy Johnstone and how in many ways it demonstrated what Celtic meant to so many.
Tony asked about the drive against sectarianism. The involvement in initiatives in the community and the Policing policy helping eradicate any problems were covered in the reply.
For the first time I heard someone from Celtic comment on the complicated issue that is sectarianism. What is classed as sectarianism by so is classed as political by others. Others object to this association of Celtic with politics.
Next on away games Quinn appealed for the chanting to desist. He also said that Celtic make nothing out of away ticket sales.
On the manager, Quinn reiterated that the club backs him. Higher wages won’t return as the club spends what they can afford. The benefits of working with this policy over the past few years is now showing.
Regarding the club aiming to be debt free. Quinn thought that this was not a requirement as it was sometimes a business policy to carry a certain manageable debt.
The Share issue helping towards the construction of the Academy at Lennoxtown was important. There is no thought at this time on any name for the Academy. All focus is on getting it ready.
On naming, Quinn stated there were no plans to rename the North Stand. Also no plans to change the South stand to increase capacity. The reason being the financial outlay would not balance the resulting increase in seating and income.
A fan on the board question was batted back with the now standard reply. To me this is becoming a bit of a boring point as nothing will ever happen. They have made this clear. On this theme he reported that the dividend reinvestment scheme raised between £40k -£45k (thousands). Not a huge sum.
On the SPL kick off times Quinn commented that the club were bound be the SPL contract and basically if we want the TV revenue we have to go along with change. They do try to keep change to the minimum disruption possible.
Lastly Quinn hinted that the manager would have "certain leeway" in the January transfer window but not to look for massive changes.
Peter Lawwell
The Chief Executive looked relaxed on the video presentation and covered a lot of points in his allocated time.
For the first section he covered the club more or less for a fans point of view. By this I mean what we were doing on the park. I liked that. We are not there purely as a business and the business is affected greatly by what happened in that rectangular area of grass and the spin off way it makes the supporters feel.
Then Lawwell moved to skim over the financial side. "On budget" "Great Shape" "Reduced loss" "Increased Revenue" were key words I homed in on.
We then got to the thinking behind the Chief Executive’s plans. Tapping in on a global market. Tours for commercial gain.
Tony Hamilton then raised the matter of Sean Maloney’s contact. Peter Lawwell started his reply by stressing he very much wanted Maloney to stay. He then made it clear that he would not compromise Celtic’s long term plans during any contract negotiations.
Last but not least Lawwell gave an overall picture. Celtic have aims on qualifying for the Champions League, retaining the SPL title and "expectations are the highest"
Again a good all round interview covering all we wanted and needed to hear.
Next up on screen was wee Gordon Strachan.
Getting right to the chase Tony asks what winning the SPL meant.
I know Gordon may have had time to prepare any answer but it was still a good one. He said he would now be part of the club history and no one can take that away from him. Winning by such a margin too. He did it with a mixture of current, new and young players in the squad.
I was a bit disappointed with his next answer. Disappointed more for Gordon than for myself. When asked if he had time to enjoy the SPL Title winning he replied along lines that he didn’t. Next day he had things to deal with. He said he got paid for the stress and that many would do his job for nothing. (for God sake don’t let the board hear that).
It was lovely of him to say that he won the Championship for 60,000 at games and every Celtic fan worldwide. He had helped them have a "fantastic feeling" – You bet you did Gordon!!!
On Petrov leaving, Strachan was very one minded on this. He only wanted him at Celtic if he was in the right mind to stay and that he knew Petrov wanted to try England.
Not rocket science I know – anyone who saw Petrov take the huff time and time again plus his petulance at the Championship celebrations, will know exactly what Strachan was aiming to say.
Me, I am off the mind now, if they don’t want to stay at Celtic let them go and forget them. One day they will look back and I bet they wish they had stayed longer. Ask a line of players who took the road out of Celtic in search for the paths paved with gold. Sometimes that gold they saw was nothing but sand- the sinking type.
Strachan was then asked if this Celtic team was now his team. He took the politician’s route and answered his own version of the question. He said he had an idea of how he wanted it played , with fitness and intelligence playing a part. Playing the way that was right for that individual game. Injuries have a part in changing teams too.
Strachan said it would be nice to bring in a player or players in January. That it is a cycle and that we have a nice balance at this time. He pointed out we have a very young back four (when Wilson plays I think he missed out here) and that half the team v Benfica were Scottish as were the scorers.
As to the priority ahead. "Winning the SPL title" "We can only have Champions League football if we are Champions".
Well said Gordon!!! And a well done to Tony Hamilton for the way it was all put over. I bet the video contents killed half the question and answer session stone dead.
Next came the bit of the AGM that is a legal requirement but in truth it bores the audience to death and is totally pointless. The audience could vote until the cows come home and it matters not one bit. The top table just put in a blanket vote and we are left with the impression that our votes are as affective as a syringe of water against a bonfire.
I will give an example. First proposal is put to a vote. Most, if not all, in audience are in favour. Then the company secretary reads out the proxy votes. I am guessing to save the top table voting they do it by proxy. He reads proxy votes cast 52.5 million of which 99.1 % were in favour.
I don’t even bother raising my voting card now.
Interesting to note that the only apparent voting against came when Dermot Desmond came up for re-election to the board.
The Last part of the AGM started about 12:06 hrs. By the end of it I was shaking my head at the stupidity some of the questions.
First question is actually a good one. It is on the subject of the ticket price of £40 for the Chelsea away friendly. Peter Lawwell rather tamely replies all Celtic can do is make representations to the away team. No Peter. You can do a lot more. Celtic should not be playing teams in friendlies or testimonials until a reasonable price is agreed on.
Second question comes from the Celtic Trust and comments on the Celtic Charity match v Liverpool. Thanking Celtic for taking it on. I have to disagree. Has anyone any idea of the total raised and given to charity after this match? I for one have not heard a thing. Tickets were being given away for fun in the lead up to the match, just to get a crowd in. I would love to know how many actually paid to get into the game.
Third question was amusing. Chap at the microphone starts by apologising for being negative. They have signed a big name. Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink. (think about it!!!!) and a small name "Sno". That brought a fair chuckle in the audience. He finished by asking for future AGMs to be indoor as he is freezing – here here I say!!!
Fourth question to me one that should never have been left to an AGM. The lady had reason to moan, but bringing a moan to the AGM without trying other avenues first is a bit much. We win the league , doing well all round and she moans about gifts and inducements offered by the Celtic Credit Card not being met in full and quick enough. To me you should have been hitting the keyboard earlier with a letter of complaint. Not sitting waiting to wash in public (I know it is shareholders but the press have snoopers there).
Peter Lawwell’s reply was an obvious one. He was disappointed to hear her complaint and she should contact him so he can look into it.
Fifth question all I can say is maybe this guy was sleeping during the video presentation. He wanted to know why Shaun Maloney’s contract had not been sorted out.
Peter Lawwell referred the shareholder to the video and that there were 2 sides to every story. Plus we can’t keep him at any cost. Again here!! and a strong coffee for the questioner next year.
Sixth question again a needless one. A lady asks why there are no females on the board. Same reply the Trust has been getting for years. Appointments are on merit. Won’t be just because it is a woman.
Seventh question – is on safety after games with crowding at Bridgeton railway station. Again – write a letter don’t sit and wait for AGMs. If they don’t reply then you have a case to raise.
Eighth question again I could not see point of this one. Shareholder commenting on vile singing at away games. It was all covered in the video. Note to staff – make it a big pot of strong coffee next year for the sleepy heads.
Ninth question shareholder looking after his own interests. By sound of his complaint he wants investor level shareholders to get two bits of the cherry for away European tickets. After admitting he got his ticket he says it was not through the investment scheme. To me we all have one backside so this means only one ticket needed.
Tenth question this takes the award of most stupid question of the day. After pointing out his seat in the North Stand he proceeds to tell us he has sat for 2 years getting a drip on his head from a flaw in the roof. That he pays £560 for his seat and in the entertainment business this is not on treating a customer this way. The jewel in the crown of this stupid question is when he tells everyone he has not reported this and so the board would not know problem existed - so he is telling them now.
I could see folk around me shaking their heads. We win the league, doing well on all fronts on and off the field and he moans about a blasted hole in the roof he has had for 2 years and done heehaw about.
I was picturing what he had given the press. A headline for the next day - a negative one.
The top table in a stunned way said they would take it on. If they get a silicon gun for the repair and there is any left over I have an idea where to use the remainder. I will resist saying frozen water on the brain – oops I just said it.
The next few questions were minor and in truth it was so cold we all wanted away.
Last question was on Petrov and a request for a breakdown on what fee Celtic received. Peter Lawwell surprisingly answered this saying all in all we get about £8m. Maybe the cold was getting to him too.
The AGM finished at 12.45. It was as quick as I could get out and get the car heater going.
I do hope next year’s is indoors or in August.
BACK TO TOP
As Good As It Gets
TEXT/JOHN MOLLOY
Since time immemorial, football teams have always had a player who is loved
by the manager but berated by the fans. In my years watching Celtic, there
has been a few notable examples including Billy McNeill and Peter Grant;
Tommy Burns and Mark McNally; and Martin O‘Neill and Alan Thompson (his last
2 years). This list is not exhaustive and you may disagree with my
selections but fundamentally there are players who have consistently pulled
on a Celtic jersey despite their performances rarely ever reaching a level
beyond mediocrity. Such a player is Paul Telfer.
Now I do not wish to insult any Celtic player but Telfer is the archetypical
'journeyman' footballer. While plying his trade with the likes of Luton,
Coventry and Southampton ,he gained a reputation for being a tough
no-nonsense defender whose best attributes were his versatility and his work
rate. For teams perennially embroiled in relegation battles, Paul Telfer
with his indomitable will and controlled aggression, was a good man to have
in the trenches. Although these are hardly character faults, surely playing
for a club like Celtic should require a little bit more - if not panache at
least the ability to find a team-mate with a pass on a regular basis. It is
this failing that defines the weakness in his overall game and so infuriates
the fans. Of course, he is not the only current Celtic player who finds
passing so problematic. Five years in and I'm still waiting to see Bobo ping
a 50-yard pass to the feet of a Celtic centre-forward. However, while our
favourite Guinean can rely on either Caldwell or McManus to take the strain,
our no.2 is afforded no such luxury. Strachan's style of football demands
quality channelled balls through to the wingers and good crosses into the
box. For the most part Paul fails to deliver.
And then there's the small matter of Telfer's first touch - Does he have
one? It's certainly no laughing matter having to watch as balls continually
roll under his feet or spin off his shins. It's like watching 'Billy Dane'
trying out for his school team without his famous 'boots.' Does Paul also
have a short-sighted old gran who keeps leaving his Valsports football boots
out for the bin man, just before the big match? If we lived in a parallel
universe Paul Telfer would be Dennis Bergkamp. Not content with making an
arse of himself , at some point during a game he will engage Boruc in a
bizarre game of 'lets play pass-back.' What's the Polish for 'Clear it tae
f**k ya weegie.' It certainly may explain why the keeper blesses himself
before each half. George Best once said of David Beckham, "He can't kick
with his left foot, he cannot head a ball, he cannot tackle and he doesn't
score many goals. Apart from that he's alright." Does this remind you of
anyone? I'm all for defending the underdog but Paul certainly pushes my
patience to the limit. As the moans and groans rain down on him from every
side of the stadium, it becomes increasingly more difficult to justify this
selection. Despite what I've just said, I have to admit I'm really starting
to feel for this guy. Is the criticism justified though? Does Strachan have
a blind spot for this player or do 99.9% of Celtic fans need a Corneal
Curvature adjustment. To try and find the answer let's walk around in the
manager's shoes for a while.
Last year, Telfer was virtually an ever present in a Celtic team that won
the league in a record breaking canter. He played 36 league games and scored
1 goal against Aberdeen at Pittodrie. In Old Firm games Paul was never a
contender for any man of the match awards but his performances were more
than adequate. Strachan's 'bhoy wonder' also lifted the CIS League Cup and
even provided the cross for Dublin's goal in the final. Quite the most
remarkable statistic of all is that this 'average Joe' was part of a Celtic
team that equalled a post war record of 5 consecutive games without losing a
goal to der hun. The right back played in all 5 matches. Let's be honest
here, can anyone remember an Old Firm game where Paul was even remotely
troubled by der hun sturmer. He is certainly unfazed by the highly charged
atmosphere of the Glasgow derby and faces down his opponent like a
Panamanian middleweight. Even his harshest critic would have to admit that
despite his 'lack of talent', he does not seem to be responsible for many
goals conceded at all. It is easy to recall the Artmedia implosion, the 4-4
game at Motherwell and Hearts 1-1, but after that... As a defender Telfer
remains an enigma - He is more likely to to throw a shy directly out of play
than give away a penalty with a rash challenge. His game is all about zonel
marking, closing down space and good positional play. Having clomped around
in Strachan's shoes for a while, I'm beginning to view Telfer in a new
light. While he's always likely to have a mare of a game like the one we
recently witnessed at Old Trafford, ostensibly Paul is a more than decent
defender. He also seems to be unassuming and a thoroughly nice guy. For Paul
Telfer this may be as good as it gets but sometimes average is good enough.
I'm now off to buy a no. 2 shirt from JJB Sports.
John Molloy
BACK TO TOP
When Saturday Comes Around
There have been many songs written about Celtic over the club's life span and everybody has a favourite. Back in 2000 the Blarney Pilgrims released an album titled "Granda was a Celtic Man" . No Celtic fan should be without this outstanding album. Unfortunetly the album was a limited edition and is no longer available. So if you are lucky enough to have a copy treasure it and hopefully in the future the album can be re-issued.
The album covers many aspects of the devotion of the Celtic support to their team and the band's lead singer and guitar player, Charlie Fealy who is also the main songwriter in the band, he penned "When Saturday Comes Around" for the thousands of Irish based Celtic supporters who make the pilgrimage to Glasgow on a regular basis. In his sleeve notes Charlie wrote that the song was "Dedicated to the ever increasing number of Celtic supporters from Ireland. It is good to know that Celtic's Irish origins still mean as much to the Irish in Ireland as to the Irish in Scotland" Seeing Celtic get the right result is reward enough for the money, time and effort put in by supporters from the Emerald Isle but to be remembered in song for generations of Celtic supporters to listen to is something special.
As the song says "When Saturday comes around this town will be our town" and who could argue. The historical Gallowgate and Gorbals areas of the city are favourite haunts of travelling supporters who fill the Celtic pubs before and after each game. Over the years the regular travellers will have noticed that city developers are slowly but surly dwarfing the area with trendy apartment blocks. Some pubs have already been bulldozed to allow for the developments.
Inside the pubs bands such as the Blarney Pilgrims, Sheeben, Charlie and the Bhoys and Gary Og have entertained Celtic fans with a blend of football influenced anthems and historical songs about Ireland fight for justice and liberty. Such songs have been scorned upon by many and those in power in Scotland who have tried to tarnish such lyrics as sectarian and racist and have come down heavy on landlords who have continued to employ bands who play such songs and juke boxes are also monitored by the Police. Basically they have outlawed the right of the Irish community in Scotland and those who visit their shores from Ireland to express their Irishness and to sing about historical events in Ireland's troubled history.
Celtic have also joined in and criticised sections of the travelling support who attend away games. Celtic and it's fans should not be tarred with the same brush as Rangers or it's fans. In doing so they have played right into the powers that be in Scotland's hands. I like the vast majority of Celtic supporters would not glorify religion or disrespect another persons colour or creed and I don't know any bands who perform in Glasgow for Celtic fans who would sing such lyrics. Our famous history and employment policies bore no resemblance with Rangers for over 100 years before they were brought kicking and screaming into modern times.
The dedication shown by those who regularly travel to Glasgow from the Emerald Isle is fantastic and although Glasgow is more accessible than ever now for supporters with cheap air travel. It is the Celtic supporters clubs who are the back bone of the ever growing Irish based support. Supporters clubs regularly organise coaches to Glasgow and make sure everybody travelling have match tickets. The camaraderie not only between members of their own supporters club but of other clubs is second to none and many friendships and relationships have been cemented on the long journeys to Paradise. Indeed many supporters spend more of their spare time in Scotland than in Ireland which goes to show how much money that Irish based Celtic supporters generate not only for Celtic football club but for the Scottish economy. Take a stroll down the Gallowgate when Celtic are not playing at home and you will see what I mean.
As Robert Kelly, Chairman of Celtic F.C. said back in 1952 "We have no need to be ashamed of our forefathers. Nor have we any cause to be ashamed that those founders of Celtic came from a country that has provided protagonists for Liberty wherever they have settled" It is only a pity that our current Chairman, Brian Quinn does not echo such sentiments before making statements about sections of the Celtic support. Supporters are the back bone of any football club and also major investors in their club.
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